What I’ve Learned About Love (+ Things Related to It)

Happy February! In honor of it being the month of love, I thought it would be appropriate to discuss a few of the insights I’ve gained in the relatively short twenty years that I have been a part of this world. I feel like naturally February is associated with the romantic love that comes with being in a relationship, but there are so many other forms of love that deserve recognition too! Today’s culture has cultivated this trend of looking forward to Valentine’s Day if you are in a steady partnership, while the rest of the world holds feelings of bitterness and makes self-deprecating jokes about loneliness, but I am here to encourage us all to embrace love generally no matter the time of year.

1. Loved Ones Deserve Love – Since coming to college, I have realized that loved ones, like family members, often serve as our emotional bounce board since we take their love for granted. They are often the ones we feel so safe with, that we dump all of our negativity, rants, stress, etc. on them. Usually, it isn’t under after we’ve cooled down and recovered from whatever situation we were dealing with, that we realize the majority of our time talking to our beloved was spent hashing out everything but what should have been the focus of the conversation. Moral of the story here: although it is healthy to express your emotions in a safe space, remember to reach out to loved ones during times when its not just because you need a shoulder to lean and cry on. Express your appreciation and love for those that are close to you, and challenge yourself to reach out to people just to see how their days are or discuss something that is making life great at the moment!

2. Love Can Heal The Wounds It Causes – Referring back to the various levels of love, sometimes we find ourselves in a position where the love we had for someone is forced to retreat into the cavities of our hearts as we are no longer able to love that person in the capacity that we previously did. These instances can often make their mark by leaving a substantial scar on our hearts, which then arouses many questions, feelings of doubt and paranoia, and potentially, deep pain and sadness. However, unlike salt, if we add love from other areas of life to the wound that love itself created, we find that new happiness and growth appears in our lives. Self-love, love from family and friends, and healing love energies from nature can all help to not only mend a gash of love, but to also thrive and blossom into more loving, powerful, and tuned-in individuals. Moral of the story here: love isn’t easy, it can inflict just as much pain as it can intense comfort, but the important thing to keep in mind is that love is everywhere. There is not ever just one sole source of love, so there should never be a lack of healing love to act as a cure for times when you are searching for the antidote to heartache.

3. Love is Ever-Present – Like I said above, love is everywhere and in everything. Sometimes though, our love levels vary, not just for different things, but for one thing in particular. I think this most strongly applies to self-love, where one minute we are feeling good and empowered, and the next we are beating ourselves up over something. It is in these times, when we feel defeated and feel a bit lack luster in our outflow of love for something, be it ourselves or a life passion, that we must keep in mind that just because we don’t feel the same strong intensity of love that we have felt before, doesn’t mean that there is no love left. Sometimes outside factors or unnamable forces drain our current love (along with other emotions!) and we find ourselves in a funk. This does not mean that for instance, if you are an English major you should go rethink your entire life the second you just aren’t feeling motivated to write an essay! Instances of low love and deficient motivation only mean that we need to sow and tend to the flame of love that still burns within us, regardless if it is currently very dim. Moral of the story: as humans, our existence is reliant on the presence of love and we always have it coursing through us even in the times when it feels absent. Essentially, we need to remember to take a few steps back and listen to our souls in an effort to get an accurate census of our fluctuating feelings.

I know I am still a student of this Earth and that I still have a multitude of lessons to learn in my lifetime, but I hope that these small pieces on love have either resonated with you, provided you with some insight, or at least inspired you to continue to spread love. This month, I challenge you to elevate your love and reach out to an old friend or someone you appreciate, give a stranger a compliment, dedicate time to enriching yourself, or partaking in some sort of gratitude/love practice that you do not already consistently do in your everyday routines. Remember that the love you pour out into the world will be returned to you! Here’s to a fresh month dedicated to the driving force of our universe!